Updated version March 2023.
Goals
What feelings does this word conjure up in your mind? Does it excite you or fill you full of dread? Do you feel a sense of purpose or does the very thought of setting and achieving a goal overwhelm you? Whatever your experience has been, if you have had challenges when it comes to achieving what you want, I'm hoping that this post may help you a little. Firstly, a bit of context. I have been fascinated by the art of goal setting for years. In particular, what is the best way to get from where you are currently to where you want to be. I'm pretty certain that most of us find it fairly straightforward to think of a goal. The trouble is, from an action point of view, what do we do next? What is the first step? One challenge I have personally experienced is setting myself a big goal and feeling like a loser when I fail to achieve it (ermm yes I should have said "goals" as I've done this to myself several times over!). Deadlines came and went and self doubt started to creap in. Was I actually capable of achieving these big goals? After a period of feeling like a bit of fraud and a failure, frustration with myself turned into a positive learning quest. I started to ask myself questions. Why had I failed to achieve these goals? I work hard, have a decent enough brain, positive attitude and I definitely want to achieve these goals, so I thought. But what was it that I was doing (or not doing) that was stopping me from achieving what I wanted?
Several books, audios, chats with my family and friends plus a period of soul searching later, I began to realise why I wasn't getting to where I wanted to be. All of the goals I had previously set myself had two main things in common. Firstly, although I thought I really wanted to reach these goals, I actually wasn't emotionally invested enough which meant when challenges came up I didn't stick consistently to the path. In other words, I hadn't connected my sense of purpose with these goals so they felt more like a task. Secondly, and just as crucially, I had no plan or road map in place! As the old saying goes "a goal without a plan is just a dream". So, apart from a vague goal description and deadline, I basically had no plan of action. No milestones to follow. With this approach, and the fact that I can be easily distracted, failure was inevitable.
"Identify your problems, but give your power and energy to solutions." Tony Robbins
Once I understood where the problems were I got to work with putting into action the steps I am about to share with you. These steps helped me focus and achieve some really important goals in the passed couple of years including starting my own business, achieving three new qualifications, as well as being fitter and healthier now in my mid forties than I was in my twenties! Of course, there is still much I want to accomplish but by taking intentional action and achieving what I set out to do has given me a new level of confidence in myself that I've never had before.
I'm sharing this with you with the sole aim to encourage you that no matter how far away from achieving your goal or how distracted you think you might get, I have absolute belief that, with the right actions, you will succeed whatever you intentionally set your mind to achieving.
Plan and take action.
So, here we go with some suggested actions to get you started:
Write your goal down and put it somewhere where you will see it often.
Consider where you are today in relation to your goal. This is an essential step as although it might feel like you are trying to see the top of Everest, if you don't acknowledge your starting point it will be very difficult to plan steps towards your goal.
Identify and write down key milestones. This is important for your journey towards your goal as it allows you to monitor progress and the opportunity to give yourself a well earned pat on the back for the successes and breakthroughs that you will have along the way.
The 3 action rule. Between each milestone, plan and write down 3 actions that will move towards your next milestone within a set time-frame. As a very generic example, if your goal is to say run 5k while improving your diet, you might start with a set time frame of 1 month to reach your first milestone of completing 2.5k as well as eating more healthily. The 3 actions in that first 1 month period could be Action 1 => Walk/Jog 3 x per week for 30mins followed by 10mins of stretching. Action 2 => Drink 2 litres of water everyday. Action 3 => Eat at least 5 portions of fruit and vegetables everyday.
Document your progress. It is definitely worth investing in a daily/weekly tracker or diary so you can log your progress. By documenting your progress and looking back over your journey you can see how far you've come which will help you grow in confidence. It will also come in useful when planning your next 3 actions.
Enjoy the process. Finding joy in the journey to your goal is fundamental to helping you stay motivated and disciplined. Journalling every evening before bed is a great way to capture how you feel about your day, what you've accomplished, what you have learned, and what you are grateful for as well as setting your intentions for the next day.
Finally, give yourself a break. Yes, get off your butt and take action, however, also recognise how awesome you are right now! Take time to reflect on what you have already achieved in your life. I'm talking about swimming your first length, starting a new job, helping someone out, overcoming a phobia. List it all! This will put you in a positive and confident mindset for taking on your current goals.
This post doesn't contain anything revolutionary but I hope there are some nuggets of information that you will find useful in your own journey.
As humans we are beautiful and complex and everybody is different. Remember to never measure your own journey with someone else's. Your reality is exactly that, yours. Strive to reach your goal but don't forget to enjoy the journey as that is where you learn all the cool stuff and grow as a person!
Here's to you and your success!
Amalia xx
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